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A woman walks into her accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant says, "Before we begin, I'll need to ask a few questions." He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, "Wha...Read More | |||
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A cowboy is sitting in a bar and a woman sits next to him and says are you a real cowbow and he says well I get up in the mornin and feed the stock I ride a horse I mend fences and herd cattle I beleive I am ...Read More | |||
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This guy goes into a bar with a crocodile under his arm. He plops the crocodile on the barstool, taps on his snout, and as the crock opens wide, he unzips his pants and lays his tool in the crock's mouth. The old crockodile remains perfectly still, mouth open, sharp teeth in place. The guy says to the bartender, "Brings me a ...Read More | |||
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A whorehouse gets busted. The girls are lined up out front, and a cop is going down the line giving them all tickets. A little, old lady approaches one of the girls at the end of the line and asks, "Why are all of you lovely ladies...Read More | |||
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One night, the cop was making his routine night patrol. As he pulls up the main street, he finds two trucks parked in the middle of the road with the lights on and the doors wide open. He decides to go and investigate. As he climbs up into the first truck he sees that it’s empty. He thinks to himself..."Maybe they're in the other truc...Read More | |||
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Mr. Bear and Mr. Rabbit didn't like each other very much. One day, while walking through the woods, and they came across a golden frog. They were amazed when the frog talked to them. The golden frog admitted that he didn`t often meet anyone, but, when he did, he always gave them six wishes. He told them that they could have 3 wishes each. Mr. Bear immediately wished that all the other bears in the forest were females. The frog granted his wish. Mr. R...Read More | |||
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A man suffering from impotence went to see a specialist. The doctor gave him a prescription that he was to take faithfully three times a day, and always with food. Two days later the man was at a formal banquet and didn't want any of the other guests to spot and possibly identify...Read More | |||
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Three friends - two straight guys and a gay guy and their significant others were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship, they all drowned. They each had to come before St. Peter to be admitted into heaven. First...Read More | |||
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An insect repellent salesman tried to sell his product to a farmer. He said he wasn't interested because he hadn't seen any bugs or insects on his farm for years. The salesman indicated he had a wife and four kids and really needed the money. The farmer still didn't think he needed any insect repellent but he felt sorry for the salesman and said, "I'm so sure there ar...Read More | |||
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Sharon who was a heavy smoker invested in a cigarette lighter to economise in matches. After a short time it began to give her trouble. So she spoke to Martin who had one, having just seen him light a cigarette with it and put it in his pocket. Sharon: "Now be a dear, and tell me about that thing you have there in your trousers." Martin: (Misunderstanding her and feeling a bit embarrassed) "I'm not used to discussing such things with ladies." Sharon: "Now there is no need to be shy. Tell me, how does yours work? Do you jerk it up and down?" Martin: "Oh, sometimes..." Sharon: "Then it's different from mine, just opens and shuts. Do you rub you...Read More | |||
